The GROW model is not new for those of you familiar with coaching, but did you know you can just it with just about anything?!
Hardly anything good in life just “happens”. So, let’s talk about how you can go about making your life, or even simply your Valentine’s day, great!
I kind of hate Valentine’s day…. It seems a lot of single people, esp. the ladies, are hoping that their special someone is going to surprise them on that day with some grand gesture revealing their true heart.
Dating people often feel some sort of pressure to make a monumental memory.
Married people can feel an overwhelming sense of duty or discontent.
All in all it can be an overwhelmingly disappointing day…BUT take heart! Here’s a plan that could save the day!
GROW stands for Goal-Reality-Options-Will
Let’s start with the G. Think about your Valentine’s day. What is your GOAL?
I decided this morning that my goal was that I wanted to make my husband feel amazing today and I knew exactly what I needed to do. I told him exactly what I wanted for Valentine’s day. This took the pressure off of him feeling like he was supposed to have ESP and then me wondering why he didn’t get me what I really wanted.
[Here’s a little tip for the ladies. THEY NEED A LITTLE HELP. Most men are happy to be there for their women but they don’t have ESP, so give them a hand at the very least by giving them some idea of what would make you feel special.]
It’s might seem lame to you, but it was heartfelt from me. I told my husband this morning that what I want this year is to have a normal day. He is truly very thoughtful, kind and expressive every day so I don’t want or need some kind of forced gesture. At least not this year.
Other years I let him know I wanted some expensive dark chocolate, or dinner at a fancy place (but probably not on the actual day as I am not a fan of crowds), or a weekend away or whatever, but this year we have been traveling and busy lately and I want to grill something at home and have a quiet normal day.
I am so blessed. I truly live a Happy Valentine’s Life – not just a a day. THANK YOU ERIC!
Okay, back to the GROW model.
If you are clear about your GOAL, your expectations are not vague.
When the goal for V-day is some sort of hope for validation from others of your worth, it can be a day of looking for something to happen from the outside, when the big opportunity is something happening on the inside!
So, stop for a moment and make a GOAL. Ask yourself these questions:
- If you are in a relationship, are you looking/hoping for a certain something from your loved one?
- Are you setting yourself up for disappointment hoping for a reveal from someone?
- Is there someone, or some group, that you could bless instead of waiting to receive?
What is your intentional GOAL for the day.
The next letter is R. Reality.
Some of the questions above can lead to a good look at the real state of your heart.
- If you are hoping for something specific from your loved one – do they know?
- If you are hoping for a movie like scene with a grand gesture, are you setting yourself up?
- Can you check your heart and change your hope toward giving instead of hoping to receive?
O is for Options.
Here’s a few I came up with:
- Ask God for a target(s). Who can you bless unexpectedly today? Maybe a stranger by paying for their coffee or meal, maybe a co-worker by sharing an intentional kind word, maybe purposefully smiling at everyone you see today?
- Be clear about your hopes for the day with those you share life with. AND ask them what they are hoping for!
- Set aside a time to ask God to share His heart with you! How beautiful! He is full of thoughts of love toward you~ Ask Him: What is one word that comes to your mind when you think of me? How have you blessed me this past year, month, day? What do you love about me? Where do you see me best sharing Your love?
W stand for Will. What will you really do?
How about take one step right now? Close your eyes for just a moment and ask Him one of those questions. He is more anxious to answer than we realize.
Have fun today! Don’t let the enemy of your soul ruin the day of love by looking for something to come your way – how about redeem the day with me and intentionally connect with Him and share some love with those around you!
Love to hear what you decide! Please share!